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confident in the call

We had a new family teaching / houseparenting couple interviewing on campus this last week and I have been mulling over one of their questions since I left the meeting.  "What is the most important contributor to success and longevity as a family teacher here?"  Essentially, what is the most crucial element to thriving for the long haul in this role in this place?  Everyone was quick to provide extremely helpful tips that have helped me acclimate and survive my first year as a houseparent at Vera Lloyd, but I found myself going back to the same seemingly cliche answer over and over again in my mind:

CONFIDENCE IN THE CALL OF THE LORD

Because when I am confident in the call I recieved from the Lord to be here with His hands and feet attached to my own limbs, then a bad day or extemrely difficult moment within that ministry becomes a part of the sanctifying story God is writing in me rather than another contributing factor to a resignation letter I could be writing.  When I am confident that God is calling me daily here to this work, then I remember He is the source for my strength when my energy is depleted, for my joy when my own happiness has been set aside, for my hope when my vision is blurred.  When I know what I am doing is what God has distinctly orchestrated for me to be doing in this moment in this place, I do not doubt Him, I doubt myself less, and I look to tomorrow as the new opportunity that it is.  And so I must remember...and to remember I must remain connected to the vine that is my Life.

I got lost in a world of reflection and sentimentality for several hours this weekend and looked back through a number of my posts at the beginning of this blog and found that it was actually rejuvenating to my soul and work.  It refueled me in many ways, because I was in a sense traveling back to the source of our call process here and remembering the day we knew without a shadow of a doubt and laid it all on the line.  That kind of confidence can fade over time through the ebbs and flows of life and with the fading can come subtle changes to our perspective and attitude.  When the calling is no longer new and fresh, it is easy to adopt a "get through it" attitude which can rob my joy in a second.  So I am thankful for the refreshing drink of perspective from the reminscent journey I spontaneously took on Friday night, as well as the indirect reminder through the new couple's question of the rock we have built this house on rather than all the daily, trivial sand. 

I believe many, many good people in this world who have a beneveloent nature, compassionate spirit, and unique skill set could come in and be rockstar houseparents...for a time.  In fact, they would probably run Barton better than we do and could connect more easily with some of our girls.  But I would not do it myself.  Not unless I felt confidently that I was a small extension from a greater sense of power.  Because, without a connection to the vine that is our Life and the confidence that we were divinely led and placed here, our impact would be short-lived (we would be long gone) and more shallow.  Because of my relationship with the Lord, my role here is not a job that I will leave when it no longer yields visible results or fulfillment.  It is a call that I will continue to fulfill until His leading guides me elsewhere.  Because of my relationships with the Lord, the work I do here is given multiple dimensions as not only the body and mind are the focus of our treatment plan but the soul, as well. 

And thus I find the basis for the fact that I have not only survived but done some thriving in this last year as well as returned to work every single Sunday night SOLEY to the calling God impressed so heavily on my heart and the confidence He gave me there within.

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