If you ever listen carefully enough, you can hear the wind blowing. If you are watching for it's evidence, you will see it move through the trees, grass, and plants.
Several months ago, a windstorm was brewing in my life unbeknownst to me. The Lord had much to say to Michael and I if we were careful enough to listen. He has much to do through us, if we are ready to watch.
Here is the story. Take or leave the details:
Before Michael and I ever married, we had talked about being foster parents. Through many signficant people and experiences in our lives, our burden was strong for hurting children who for whatever reason were unable to experience the joy of a home, a family, and God's grace and love. We entered marriage knowing that somehow this burden would uniquely affect our story but wanting only God's timing and answer for what that would look like. With so many children needing homes and attention and love, we have not felt specifically called to have our own children at this point, either, and have left the formation of our family completely up to the Lord. About two years into marriage, finding ourselves constantly surrounded with our community's need for foster parents and the call becoming increasingly heavy on our hearts, we decided to take the 3 month Foster Care lisencing class to get our questions answered. We weren't intending to jump into the venture but use the class we would need someday to find out how this might fit into our story. We LOVED this class and were eager to find ways to implement what we were learning. About this time, our favorite home in Salina (with plenty of room for foster kids and expansion) became available, and we were quick to buy it. We have loved our house. We went ahead and began the lisencing process for foster care once we moved in (since a lot of lisencing actually has to do with your house), and I had a lot of fun buying fun things for the little girl's room we had set up. Only a few things remained on our list to be done before we started having lisencing visits, and we hit a WALL. There was nothing in the licensing process that went wrong, nothing necessarily with our house or schedule that changed, but spiritually, emotionally, and in every other way you can possibly discern something, SOMETHING was trying to stop us from moving any further. About the same time, Michael's dissatisfaction and unfulfillment in his educational career began to make itself known daily. We began to pray. What was going on? The wind was blowing, and it was about at this point, that we opened our ears and eyes and began to see as the Lord began to show and tell us things we never would have known otherwise. It was during this time in my personal Bible study time that I began pursuing simplicity and quiet with the Lord, resonating with others who felt their ears "closed to his still small voice" and "numb to his touch," (excerpts from my Bible study). I began listening. I began feeling. I underlined and starred in my study a quote from St. Augustine:
I was finding rest. And together, as a couple, we were discovering a whole bundle of other things. Evidently, there is an entire profession out there that couples can enter together that is essentially ministry as full-time foster parents to several children (8-12) at a time. Neither of us had ever heard of such a thing, and in the back of our minds, had both always wondered how a full-time teaching career, a lifestyle of youth ministry, and filling a house with foster kids would all fit together. In a really miraculous way, we discovered the world of HouseParents (also called Family Teachers, Teaching Parents, etc.). You can get a taste of this world here. It soon became our "next" thing. "That is probably what God is calling us to do next with our lives...whenever that is..." we both found ourselves saying repeatedly. It was within months that God moved in both of our hearts to realize, His call was coming sooner than we expected. For the first time in the almost 3 years in my position at the church, I was given a feeling of release that can only be described as the Lord. There is absolutely no reason to leave at this time except that God is telling me it is time. Days have not been this good and ministry is going places, but God is doing something new.
He has been building a puzzle, you see. He picks up the first piece: the burden on Michael's heart and my heart for hurting children in need of a family, a home, love, and grace. Places it with the second piece: years of preparation in our hearts and mind (and even the Foster Care Class) to work with those children in a home setting. Pick up the third, fourth, and fifth pieces: Michael's education background and experience, my counseling and youth ministry education and experience, and Michael's volunteer work for the last two years with at-risk youth. Pick up the sixth piece: God's clear discerned call to lay down our nets and follow Him into this new life. And a picture begins to form before us. It is our future. It is where He leads us, it is where we'll follow. It is scary, unknown, difficult, and intimidating. It is beckoning us, calling us, asking everything of us...
And we have answered. We are now walking in faith to answer the call to wherever the Lord leads. We have or will soon resigned our positions effective this summer and are pursuing the interview process with our top ministry sites for houseparenting. We not only do not know exactly what is ahead, but we have no idea what it will lead to later. All we know is that our obedience now will place us exactly where we need to be to discover the "rest" of our lives! At this point in our lives, we find ourselves in these words:
To do so, we will be leaving behind some of the dearest things to our hearts. Our home church (home church to Michael since age 0 and home to me since 8th grade) has been the canvas we have painted the first 3 years of our marriage and lives together upon. The people here are our extended family, and the youth are in so many ways, our children. We have learned and grown so much through the ministry here and will forever be indebted to FCC for the love and grace that has continually been bestowed upon us. We will miss everyone tremendously, and we will quickly miss the youth ministry lifestyle, I am sure. We also leave our families that still live in Salina, whom we have been blessed to live in town with for the last 3 years. It was an unexpected but wonderful turn of events to return home after college for ministry and work and discover the richness of time with our siblings and parents, and we will miss the regular time we were able to spend with them. It has been a very special gift for me to have both of my brothers in the youth ministry while I was here. We will leave friends who have walked through so much with us the last few years, as well as a town and community we love. We also will leave our house which we have cherished more than we probably should any material thing in our lives, and our short time in it breaks our hearts.
Yet, we are filled with excitement as we watch the future unfold before our eyes... Please, join us on this journey and return to this blog to hear how the Lord leads and the adventures we experience in the coming months! I will be faithful to share stories and news, as well as thoughts provoked by our experiences. We plead with you to endeaveor into prayer with and for us. We need as many prayer partners as we can attain for a ministry entailing so much while consuming so much. We know we will survive by prayer alone.
I am affirmed by the words of Cynthia Heald who wrote the Bible Study that has held me through this process:
Several months ago, a windstorm was brewing in my life unbeknownst to me. The Lord had much to say to Michael and I if we were careful enough to listen. He has much to do through us, if we are ready to watch.
Here is the story. Take or leave the details:
Before Michael and I ever married, we had talked about being foster parents. Through many signficant people and experiences in our lives, our burden was strong for hurting children who for whatever reason were unable to experience the joy of a home, a family, and God's grace and love. We entered marriage knowing that somehow this burden would uniquely affect our story but wanting only God's timing and answer for what that would look like. With so many children needing homes and attention and love, we have not felt specifically called to have our own children at this point, either, and have left the formation of our family completely up to the Lord. About two years into marriage, finding ourselves constantly surrounded with our community's need for foster parents and the call becoming increasingly heavy on our hearts, we decided to take the 3 month Foster Care lisencing class to get our questions answered. We weren't intending to jump into the venture but use the class we would need someday to find out how this might fit into our story. We LOVED this class and were eager to find ways to implement what we were learning. About this time, our favorite home in Salina (with plenty of room for foster kids and expansion) became available, and we were quick to buy it. We have loved our house. We went ahead and began the lisencing process for foster care once we moved in (since a lot of lisencing actually has to do with your house), and I had a lot of fun buying fun things for the little girl's room we had set up. Only a few things remained on our list to be done before we started having lisencing visits, and we hit a WALL. There was nothing in the licensing process that went wrong, nothing necessarily with our house or schedule that changed, but spiritually, emotionally, and in every other way you can possibly discern something, SOMETHING was trying to stop us from moving any further. About the same time, Michael's dissatisfaction and unfulfillment in his educational career began to make itself known daily. We began to pray. What was going on? The wind was blowing, and it was about at this point, that we opened our ears and eyes and began to see as the Lord began to show and tell us things we never would have known otherwise. It was during this time in my personal Bible study time that I began pursuing simplicity and quiet with the Lord, resonating with others who felt their ears "closed to his still small voice" and "numb to his touch," (excerpts from my Bible study). I began listening. I began feeling. I underlined and starred in my study a quote from St. Augustine:
You have made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless till they find their rest in you.
I was finding rest. And together, as a couple, we were discovering a whole bundle of other things. Evidently, there is an entire profession out there that couples can enter together that is essentially ministry as full-time foster parents to several children (8-12) at a time. Neither of us had ever heard of such a thing, and in the back of our minds, had both always wondered how a full-time teaching career, a lifestyle of youth ministry, and filling a house with foster kids would all fit together. In a really miraculous way, we discovered the world of HouseParents (also called Family Teachers, Teaching Parents, etc.). You can get a taste of this world here. It soon became our "next" thing. "That is probably what God is calling us to do next with our lives...whenever that is..." we both found ourselves saying repeatedly. It was within months that God moved in both of our hearts to realize, His call was coming sooner than we expected. For the first time in the almost 3 years in my position at the church, I was given a feeling of release that can only be described as the Lord. There is absolutely no reason to leave at this time except that God is telling me it is time. Days have not been this good and ministry is going places, but God is doing something new.
He has been building a puzzle, you see. He picks up the first piece: the burden on Michael's heart and my heart for hurting children in need of a family, a home, love, and grace. Places it with the second piece: years of preparation in our hearts and mind (and even the Foster Care Class) to work with those children in a home setting. Pick up the third, fourth, and fifth pieces: Michael's education background and experience, my counseling and youth ministry education and experience, and Michael's volunteer work for the last two years with at-risk youth. Pick up the sixth piece: God's clear discerned call to lay down our nets and follow Him into this new life. And a picture begins to form before us. It is our future. It is where He leads us, it is where we'll follow. It is scary, unknown, difficult, and intimidating. It is beckoning us, calling us, asking everything of us...
And we have answered. We are now walking in faith to answer the call to wherever the Lord leads. We have or will soon resigned our positions effective this summer and are pursuing the interview process with our top ministry sites for houseparenting. We not only do not know exactly what is ahead, but we have no idea what it will lead to later. All we know is that our obedience now will place us exactly where we need to be to discover the "rest" of our lives! At this point in our lives, we find ourselves in these words:
Why are you doing what others can do,when you are leaving undone what only you can do? (Bruce Bugbee)
To do so, we will be leaving behind some of the dearest things to our hearts. Our home church (home church to Michael since age 0 and home to me since 8th grade) has been the canvas we have painted the first 3 years of our marriage and lives together upon. The people here are our extended family, and the youth are in so many ways, our children. We have learned and grown so much through the ministry here and will forever be indebted to FCC for the love and grace that has continually been bestowed upon us. We will miss everyone tremendously, and we will quickly miss the youth ministry lifestyle, I am sure. We also leave our families that still live in Salina, whom we have been blessed to live in town with for the last 3 years. It was an unexpected but wonderful turn of events to return home after college for ministry and work and discover the richness of time with our siblings and parents, and we will miss the regular time we were able to spend with them. It has been a very special gift for me to have both of my brothers in the youth ministry while I was here. We will leave friends who have walked through so much with us the last few years, as well as a town and community we love. We also will leave our house which we have cherished more than we probably should any material thing in our lives, and our short time in it breaks our hearts.
Yet, we are filled with excitement as we watch the future unfold before our eyes... Please, join us on this journey and return to this blog to hear how the Lord leads and the adventures we experience in the coming months! I will be faithful to share stories and news, as well as thoughts provoked by our experiences. We plead with you to endeaveor into prayer with and for us. We need as many prayer partners as we can attain for a ministry entailing so much while consuming so much. We know we will survive by prayer alone.
I am affirmed by the words of Cynthia Heald who wrote the Bible Study that has held me through this process:
Each of our lives is the canvas on which the Master is producing a work of art that will fill the everlasting ages with His praise. It is God who created us and takes responsibility for our lives; therefore as His child, we can trust Him to lead us.*
*based on Ephesians 2:8-10
Awesome Betsy!!!!
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